Be warned, the next person that asks me if it is hot enough for me, I'm going to spin them around and give them a wedgie maybe even a nuclear wedgie--you know where the small particles in their drawers smash into their subatomic chin. Don't make me have to get ugly. When people ask me that asinine question, I always want to tell them, "Of course not, I'll have to slow roast all night before my flesh falls off my bones". Here is where I insert the democrat joke, but I will give it a break.
I was in Lowe's Home Improvement yesterday. For the Canadians, Lowe's is a home improvement warehouse similar to Home Depot. I was walking past the John Deere riding mowers and noticed that every single mover had a sign on it that said if you bought a John Deere mover, you would receive a John Deere hat. I thought about that for a couple minutes (stuff is taking longer for me to process due to the heat--don't get me started on the heat again), and I thought to myself what kind of person would make the decision to buy an expensive lawnmower just to get a hat? The sign made me want to call Deb and tell her I wanted to buy another John Deere mower just so I can get a John Deere hat. I know Deb, and she would want me to have that hat. I would covet the hat for the rest of my life. Maybe I would buy two mowers, so Deb and I could have matching John Deere hats. The hat would give me shade and people wouldn't ask me if it is hot enough for me every ten minutes--I said that last part with my teeth clinched.
Work has been beating my up lately. I am almost caught up from the work related things that accumulated during our trip to Canada. Being away from home caused me to have a laundry list of stuff needing my attention. It is nice being needed but the last few days have been ridiculous. I should get caught up this weekend just in time to start it all over again next week. I'll quit whining in a couple weeks. But I guarantee you, I will make the next person that asks me if it is hot enough for me whine. Yeah baby, it is going to be nuclear wedgie in Raleighwood for that idiot.
Deb said that she found pieces of taffy in Monty and Riley's fur from their little adventure into eating the entire bag of taffy from our bed. Riley had some on his rear leg and Monty had taffy stuck to his tail. Now how did he get it on his tail? We are stilling giggling over the images of the puppies sitting on our bed chewing a bag of taffy.
Speaking of the puppies, while we were traveling up north, the people that met Monty and Riley usually said the same things. They all would say how pretty the puppies were, then they would comment on how hot the puppies get in our weather. I usually told them that Monty and Riley had zippers on their bellies and would take their fur off--like a coat--when it was hot. What they didn't know was that I have been teaching the puppies to viciously attack people that ask me if it is hot enough for me. But the puppies would only attack a bag of taffy and not people. I might have to trade them in on pitbulls if my current attitude continues.
It is getting late and I need my beauty sleep. I keep sleeping but I am not beautiful yet. Maybe it will happen tomorrow. See you later.
Al
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