Monday, November 30, 2009

November 30. 2009 Holbrook, AZ

I said that we would not leave until Tuesday. I lied. We left this morning after the NOAA radio said that the forecast included snow for Tomorrow. We decided we wanted to be on the other side of the plateau which included the continental divide. The elevation for most of the day was from 6100 7200 ft. We have another 500 miles till Palm Springs, CA.

The drive through the m0untains was spectacular. The rock was charcoal black at times and rust colored at others. We took some pictures from the RV and will post them when I can.

Speaking of RV, when we stopped for fuel today at a truckstop, we saw a homemade "private RV". It was actually a Uhaul style truck with the boxbed removed. The guy had mounted a drop-in pickup camper behind the cab. There was about 6 ft or so of remaining chassis where he mounted some spare steel which may have been a wheelbarrow. The truck was pulling a flat bed trailer with a car on it. The car's front end was a few feet off the trailer on a ramp. I got to looking at the ramp and it was a 2"x10" board on its side. Why that board didn't break was beyond me. We see quite a few of similar "RVs" here. I took a couple pictures of the hillybilly's motorhome and will post them when we get to Palm Springs.

Usually, we stop every 2-3 hours to allow us and the puppies a chance to walk around. During one of the stops at a Navajo Indian store I noticed a small religious pamphlet at a frybread stand. This pamphlet had no writing in it and was totally illustrated. It had pictures of Adam and Eve (I guess) and further in had pictures of Indians doing certain things. Several pictures were of an Indian holding a liquor bottle. Several of the people in the pamphlet had a disease that left them with splotches all over them I gave this pamphlet some thought. I believe it was intended to bring God to heathen, drunken, and illiterate Indians who have the Ebola virus. Boy, I thought my life was tough at times.

I forgot to mention that in Santa Fe while I was being tortured at the Palace of Governors, I noticed this really cool display of very old crucifixes, you know the type with Jesus and the cross. The Spaniards loved that kind of stuff. There must have been 50 of these 3ft tall carvings with different depictions of what Jesus looked like. A commonality that stood out in abundance was that Jesus looked like a Conquistador on each crucifix. All these years I thought he looked like a white hippy. Boy was I shocked to find out he was Spanish. He had the triangular beard and mustache on each of them. I was so moved that I plan to do a tribute on the Love Boat's huge dash to the Madonna and Jesus (pronounced with a Hey and not a Je). Walmart surely has plastic dashboard depictions of our Saviour somewhere.

Tomorrow is Sedona, AZ.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Sunday, Nov 29, 2009 Santa Fe

Our schedule held until today. A low pressure system is hovering over New Mexico, and is going to bring snow here. We have to climb through several mountain ranges to get to Arizona. The weather in the mountains is supposed to be white out conditions. So, we are going to hold up here in Santa Fe until this storm passes. I think we might leave on Tuesday but not before then. I will update this posting later with the fun stuff we did today.

Update:
Deb wanted to go to some museums today. I really didn't want to spend all day in museums. I'm a science and technology museum kind of guy. But I knew that Santa Fe wouldn't have anything reasonably close to a science museum. So, Deb said why don't we go to The Plaza for lunch which is in the oldest part of town. The area is full of 400 year old buildings. So, we went to The Plaza and had lunch at a really neat place. Now here is when I should have faked a migraine or embolism or something. Deb asked if we could see the Palace of the Governors to which I said okay. That was my first big mistake for the day. It turned out to be a museum. She had tricked me. Parts of it were less numbing than others. In one part they had dug up beneath the floors and exposed what was once a native condominium. However, we went to the second part of the museum and it was excruciatingly mind numbing that went on and on and on. We finally made it to the end and left. Deb said she wanted a sweatshirt with Santa Fe written across the front. She really enjoys being a walking fashion billboard. So, she said, "...let's stop at the Jackalope store on the way home". Here is where I made mistake number two. We arrived at Jackalopes' and it looked rather benign from the outside. So, I went in thinking it might be fun. I should have suspected something amiss from the pavilion of necklaces and rocks outside. When I opened the door it hit me with two senses. First the smell of incense and and sounds of Peruvian pan flute music. That's right I was in a hippy store. What is worse is that it turns out to be a hippy mega-mart. They had the wittle string yack hats, pan flutes, serapes, candles, and an entire record store of hippy music. The clothes all came pre- stinky just for the aspiring hippies which arrive here in droves. Then Deb left me alone in this place. I had visions of her buying some of that crap and hippieing up our motorhome. But it didn't happen. Her upbringing was tested and she passed again. She comes from good stock. We left Weirdmart and went to Albertson's which is a grocery store. Would you believe that the grocery store had an incense section. Good lord you could smell that crap two aisles over. Deb wanted to buy some granola cereal, so we had to find the cereal aisle. Well that wasn't hard. Most of an entire aisle was granola. Surprise, surprise. The earth people of Santa Fe have spoken. Geez louise. I guess all of the sandal wearing, save the earth people shopped at this store. Good lord. I have all day tomorrow here too.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

Nov 28, 2009 Santa Fe

We stayed another day in Santa Fe. The weather is a concern for our departure tomorrow.

I forgot in the earlier posts to mention that Deb has been working from the motorhome while I drove. I installed a cell phone/data card amplifier that really helped out. She had internet and cell phone coverage almost the entire time--even out in the sticks. She talks on the cellphone with a special microphone that I bought that cancels the road noise. Nobody knows that she is in a motorhome on the interstate unless she tells them. I added a few other goodies to the motorhome that have helped out dramatically. I call this using technology instead of technology using you.

Today we went to Santa Fe's farmer's market and old rail center. Santa Fe is well known for freaks. Now I know where they gather in large quantities--at the farmers market. The place was full of hippies and earth children. A good number of these freaks were wearing ski caps that were made of yack hair. Yeah I said yack hair. They weren't exactly ski caps either. The caps were an adult version of the little caps that mommies put on their babies. You know the type with the string to tie under their wittle heads. Oh yeah, they looked like big ole hippy babies. I caught myself thinking that I ought to knock the yack off their stinking heads. I'll bet the idiots all voted for BO. How's that change working out for you hippy idiots? Oh the rising unemployment rate hasn't harmed the hippies at all. They didn't have jobs to start with. I'll bet I could cut some hair off my butt and spin it into hats and sell it to the hippies. Now that would be funny. Hippies wearing Yuck hats. Oh, there were other idiots at the market too.

We took the puppies to a "dog park" too. It was a huge area where the city allowed the dogs to run off leash. It had no fences and the pups had a blast. They ran around playing with other dogs. I wouldn't want to let the dogs run there in the summer due to snakes but November is safe. The pups will be cooped up tomorrow.

We leave for Sedona, AZ in the morning. At least I hope we do with snow in the forecast for tonight.

Nov 27, 2009 Santa Fe

I heard today that Santa Fe is the second oldest city in the US. We arrived at the Los Campos RV Park in the early afternoon due to a time change. We had just gotten used to Central time when it changed again.
The RV park is alright. The sites are long and narrow. The park is 1/4 full with what looks like people parked for a while.
Oh goody, the weather forecast for this area is snow. We have to cross this plateau on Sunday that is scary when dry. I was told by a local that snow is likely on the plateau. We might have to hold up here.
We went in to the central market area of Santa Fe today. People were lined up on the sidewalks selling stuff like Indian jewelry and pottery. We took the pups with us and Riley wanted everybody to pet him--typical Riley. The buildings in that area were very old with the typical Santa Fe architecture. It was fun to see.
We went to dinner at a typical Arizona/New Mexico restaurant tonight. Green chilis on everything. Deb was indoctrinated into this style food. It is similar to Mexican food but with a flare idiosyncratic to this area. After dinner we came home and went to bed early. The traveling is beginning to catch up with us. The time change already has caught up.

Thanksgiving Day in Amarillo, TX

We are in Amarillo, TX at the Fort Amarillo RV Park. This is a nice RV park in a nondescript town. This town has 137K people or so the sign says. Geez Louise, I didn't see but 4 people the whole day. Correction, we went to "The Super Walmart" late today. Yes it is Thanksgiving Day and I saw some really slutty looking women. Good Lord these women were tarted up worse than Tammy Faye Baker (God rest her sole). These women put on Krylon spray eye shadow by the case. Good lord, did their mama teach them this.

We went to the Cadillac Ranch late today. Humans suck. NO, humans really suck. The cars have been ripped, torn, and painted to ugliness. They (the media) recommended that we bring spray paint to leave our mark. I don't think so. The cars had a 1/4" paint depth on each car. The next part upsets me more. Droves of sheeple happily spray painted the skeletal remains of what once was a piece of modern art. Kids ran around throwing stones at it. I was ashamed t0 see what our society had evolved into. What really tipped the scales were the cans of spray paint that littered the landscape. Hundreds of cans of spray paint were lying on the ground. They came, they painted, they trashed the place. Humans suck. With that in mind Riley (one of our pups) did a naughty. He pooped on a car at the Cadillac ranch. Yep, Riley doesn't like modern art.

Deb did the classic Thanksgiving meal today for us. She is too sweet. She planned this dinner weeks ago.

Deb drove the Love Boat for about 75 miles today. She did great. We found a section of road that had little traffic, almost no hills, and was wide. It made sense to let her try her hand at driving.

We leave tomorrow for Santa Fe.

November 25, 2009 Tulsa

Well the Andy William's Christmas Special was wonderful. Andy Williams is 82 and can still sing. His show had several very talented performers and the band was exceptionally good. We had a blast. The crowd was largely elderly people many of which had trouble walking. After the show I was concerned that the mass exodus of whitetoppers might require hours to clear the building. So I figured if the crowd was moving too slow I would stand up on a chair and yell, "Cracker Barrell has 2 for 1 dinner specials for the next 30 minutes." That would clear the house in 2 minutes.

Please don't be confused about Andy's show. It was wonderful. He remains a showman. Women still lust after him and throw their panties up on stage. However now the panties are connected to supphose and don't quite have the same effect.

Did I say that I loved the show? The crowd was as much entertainment as the actors.

We drove the magically HWY 160 today. It is a very sinuous road but nothing like I expected. The Crapper dealt with it quite well. If The Crapper had more horsepower and suspension Deb might have screamed bloody murder. The road was nothing like I expected. North Carolina has a couple roads much worse that HWY 160. The Love Boat would not be a good vehicle to drive on it but it was nothing like the road on Monday. I did notice a campground underwater there. I have pictures that I will post when I figure out how to do so. The campground was next to a major lake that flooded. That is all we know. When we were PT Crappering the road we passed an older motorhome that was headed in the opposite direction. We laughed and said that their GPS took them down the supposed "curvy road from hell". Later we retraced our path and returned to the underwater campground, you might guess who we found in the parking lot there. If you guessed the older motorhome you are correct. Evidently somebody didn't get the memo that the campground required a propeller to find their campsite.

One last thing about Branson. We saw a convenience store in the downtown area that had the normal gas pumps and stuff. What this store unique was that it advertised on its sign, guns, ammo, liquor, and hot dogs. Doesn't that sound like a man's Walmart?

We are in Tulsa, OK. Tulsa is a nice town--sort of like Raleigh. We have a spot at the Warrior RV Park. Warrior my big old hairy butt. This place sucks. Did I mention that it sucks. The pull through sites are actually pull throught sites but... In a motorhome pulling a car, the utility connections are usually in the center of the 65 ft pad. That is so that you can use a sewer connection less than 20 ft. This "RV Park" had them at the end of the pad exactly where the car would sit. Well duh, we don't carry hoses, electric lines, or sewer hoses long enough to go 30ft. So we were forced to disconnect the car. Which lengthens our time to get out by about 20-30 minutes. To make matters worse, we are next to an extremely busy road. The noise will keep us up.

I got to be a part of a 2 million Christmas light display kickoff tonight. I am a lucky man. James Shelby of the Rhema Church is in charge of it. This is likely the largest and best Christmas light display in the US. Wow is all I can say.

We had dinner at Val and Kurt's house. Val wanted to make sure that we had a Thanksgiving, home cooked meal. Dinner was wonderful as well as their company. Thank you again for dinner.

November 23 and 24, 2009 Branson, MO

Today is Tuesday, Nov 24, 2009. We arrived in Branson about dark last night. The last 30 miles of interstate made me pay for the first part of easier roads of the morning. The last part had roads that didn't spiral around a mountain but went straight up and down. I was worried on several of the mountains that the motorhome would not make the climb but it did--at 10 mph. I missed not having that Allison Transmission in my truck with the grade braking.

The campground in Branson is next to a river and is nice but for the life of me I don't know why this place is sooooo highly rated. The campground is called Cooper Creek. Deb was on the phone when we pulled in so I registered us at the office.. The campground office guy was not people friendly. He had a paper reservation system too. I say again, I don't get the attraction of this place. We are about 2 miles from the theater strip.

Last night we went into town for the "Trail of Christmas Lights" last night. It was lame. It should be called the "Trail of Fleecing You Out of Twenty Dollars".The trail is on the Shepherd of the Hills property or thereabouts. It had the road/trail lined in minilights and a few other things too but that was about it. They did have a bunch of mannequins in little outbuildings along the trail. Evidently they use the same trail for other holidays. Like the 4th of July which that display became a Christmas display by putting holly and pine cones on some of the stuff. They had a dinosaur display too that became a Christmas display by putting Santa hats on the dinosaurs. It took me 500 feet into the 2 1/2 mile trail to determine that it was not what I expected. To further make matters worse a car in front of us had to stop and gawk at each and every thing they passed lengthening my misery. Of course there were no provisions to go around the guy so I had to gawk at each and every display with him. What was tremendously funny was a girl about 17 years old came riding by on the trail on a miniature horse. Don't ask me why she was out there and why she was on a midget horse but she was. We had the rear windows partially down so the puppies could stick their heads out. Well, when the girl rode past our car the puppies were waiting for her and barked themselves silly at her through the open window. She passed about 3 feet or less from the car.. Of course the pony picked up speed and disappeared into the darkness. The puppies had a blast barking at her. Both puppies would sniff and gawk at the animated, sort of real looking reindeers that we passed. They knew the stuff wasn't real because they didn't bark at it. They do know a midget horse when they see one. Riley was bored and wanted to jump out and pee on the stuff. After 500 ft of the trail, I wanted to join him.

We have 3rd row center tickets for Andy Williams Christmas show. It is a variety show and should be good. It has good reviews. There are a couple shows here that remind me of Cluck Cluck Boy at the World's Most Stupidest Christmas Show in Refro Valley,KY where some guy dressed in a chicken suit and clucked We Wish You a Merry Christmas. You know the same type of slap-stick, mindless, stick a pencil in my eye to make me not notice the humor, kind of show. Of course the "family show" people line up for the fleecing at that type of show. I think it is great because it keeps them out of the good shows.

The PT Crapper is doing great now after the last few days of problems. The demons that possessed it earlier in the trip fell off when I went over that death defying, ultra narrow bridge over the Ohio River. At least now I suspect they did, but at the time I was too busy trying to find the best place to crash the motorhome.

Yesterday before we left Popular Bluff, MO yesterday I went online to buy the Andy Williams tickets. The guy was a Chatty Cathy kind of guy and asked me how we were coming to town. I said HWY 65 till HWY 160 then 160 into town. He said that 160 was amazingly curvy and did not recommend driving the Love Boat over that road. So, I adjusted the path around HWY 160 which took another 65 miles. When we got to Branson I spoke to a local about the roller coaster ride for the last 30 minutes on the interstate and she said "...oh that is nothing compared to HWY 160."So today we are taking the Crapper to HWY 160 to see what was so bad..

Nov 22 Popular Bluff, MO

We drove from Nashville to Popular Bluff, MO today. We are at Bullwinkles Rustic Resort and Campground. Yes it is rustic. The campground is fine. It is off the highway so road noise isn't a concern.

We went to Bullwinkle's Bar (next door) and got a beer. This place was really neat. It had a partial airplane on the roof which looked like it crashed into it. The inside of the bar was amazing. The insides was filled with unusual stuff like a boa conscriptor skin across the ceiling. It had a model train that ran around the bar which would go in and out the room via holes cut through the walls. There was too much stuff to mention. We enjoyed this place.

Our GPS routed us through rough roads. The motorhome was a wide as the road in some places. What really scared me was the roads near the Ohio and Mississippi Rivers. Holy moly. The road bed was pitched to one side at a steep angle and was washboarded. I just knew that I was going to drive off into the swamp. Then we got to the Ohio River bridge and I was terrified. This was a narrow bridge that was high off the ground. I don't care for heights, and I really don't care for bridges that I can see through. I got over the first bridge then stopped to regain my composure. Then the second bridge, which crossed the Mississippi River, was about 1/2 mile from the first bridge. The second bridge was not as high but was extremely narrow. I had the motorhome wheels on the centerline and was worried that I would meet another wide vehicle and would trade mirrors with it. But I didn't.

The rest of the day was okay.

Nov 21, 2009 Nashville

We arrived in Nashville about 3pm. The trip from Knoxville was casual. We arrived at Two Rivers RV about 3pm. We had a little surprise waiting for us in that The Crapper's battery was dead. Luckily a tow truck showed up gave us a jump. We bought a battery charger at "The Walmart" and the problem was history. I think I fixed the problem that caused the battery to die. We shall see.'

Speaking of Walmart, the people we saw in there were scary looking. Good lord why do they always congregate at "The Walmart"?

Before we left Raleigh we bought a seat belt restraint system for the dogs. It isn't safe allowing them to run around while The Love Boat is in motion. The first day they were miserable. Today they were a little less miserable. We might have to use the earplugs that we both at "The Walmart" while driving. The dogs don't like being restrained. Tough. Get over it. Neither do I.

We went to the Ryman Theatre for The Grand Ole Opry tonight. Here is the lineup of people that played:

Jimmy Dickens
Jimmy C. Newman
Holly Williams (Hank Williams' grand-daughter)
The Whites
Jack Greene
Ralph Stanley
Mike Snider
Ray Pillow
Charlie Daniels Band
Opry Square Dancers
Vince Gill
Connie Smith
The Lovell Sisters


This was a spectacular show. The Opry is always fun. This show was really good. The announcer introduced Ralph Stanley as Dr. Ralph Stanley. I was intrigued and researched the Dr designation when I got home. It turns out that he received an honorary doctorate in music from a small university. I guess he decided that he earned the title. The Lovell Sisters are young women about 18-22 years old. They have played on The Opry a few times in the past. They sang nicely but their stage presence needed some work. While they were playing they would swing widely from side to side. I thought they looked like they were using Weedeaters on stage. So now we call them the Weedeater Sisters.


Another notable thing that occurred during the show was a lady would run up the aisle during every song and photograph the person on stage. Our seats were on the aisle, center stage, 6 rows from the stage. These were excellent seats. Well this woman ran up the first time and Deb whispered to me that she had a mullet hairstyle. I looked and sure enough her hair was long in the back, about an inch on top, and it had a single huge curl at the top near the back. It was a classic mullet hairstyle. While she was walking by us to her seat we noticed that she was about 65 years old. Somebody forgot to tell her the 70s ended 30 years ago. She must be the queen of her trailer park.


Nov 20, 2009 Start of Trip

We were up at 3am this morning. We had The Love Boat (motorhome) in the driveway which is elevated from the highway and requires a few minutes to get it out. We did and I started the hookup process for The Crapper (PT Cruiser) which is towed behind the motorhome. That is when I noticed the auxiliary braking system for the car was not working. I had to rewire a connector which took about an hour. So, we had a rocky start.

My brother David is staying at our house while we are gone. That is nice of him. We appreciate the fact that David presence will deter breakins.

We had to detour around the rock slide which took a couple extra hours. The wind was gusting and made my day a little harder. We arrived at Knoxville at the Soaring Eagle Campground shortly after dark. We went to bed early but soon realized that the road noise from the interstate was really bad. It turns out we were 200 ft from the interstate. We are going to buy earplugs. I think somebody added the "ing" to the campground name by mistake. Sore Eagle would be a better name. The eagle would be sore about being kept up all night by the noise from trucks.

The PT Crapper did something strange today. I hope I fixed it.