Alrighty then. We aren't sure if today is Feb 26 or Feb 27. We are confused on several planes and could care less because are on vacation. Tomorrow we arrive in Dalian, China and really know very little about the city even though we sat through a forty-five minute "lecture" about the city today. The woman that gave the lecture talked about herself, cruise line policy, and then finally why she wouldn't answer question during the "lecture". She talked about everything but Dalian. I'd talk about Dalian here but I know jack squat about the place.
On cruise ships, eight passengers are grouped together at the same dinner table for the entire voyage unless you take a Norwegian Cruise Line "Freestyle" cruise, and you are grouped together as the dude at the door sees fit. I would have called the door dude a Maitre' d, but I can't spell Maitre' d. "Freestyle" cruising means women can wear their "sweatsuits" to dinner along with their husbands dressed in their "#3 Earnhardt is gone but not forgotten" dress, commemorative t-shirts. We took a "Freestyle" cruise from Charleston, SC a few years ago on The Redneck Riviera, and some of those ladies actually had writing on the rear of their best Sunday Go To Meeting Sweatpants that said horrible things like "sexy" or "juicy" in huge letters scrolled across their huge butts. It was horrible, and we won't "Freestyle" cruise (read Freakstyle cruise) again unless we lose our minds. I'm shivering at this very minute just thinking about the subject. Dang, where was I? Oh yeah, passengers are grouped together at dinner for the entire voyage, which in our case is 12 days. Twelve long or short days depending on several factors. At dinner last night we met our table mates. Our table seats eight people and one couple didn't show which left us with a nice couple from California and another couple I will refer to as Chatty Cathy and Mumbles (CC & M). I thought about calling this woman Yackzilla or Queen Wrong but Chatty Cathy better describes her. Mumbles is called Mumbles because Chatty Cathy hasn't allowed him to speak in twenty-four years of excruciating marriage. I would imagine twenty-four horrible years without the possibility of parole. This woman never shut her mouth for the entire dinner. A very, very long dinner. Luckily Deb got paired off with CC & M as dinner progressed, and I got to ignore CC & M and got to talk to the other couple and had a nice time. Deb took one for the team whether she wanted to or not. This morning we went to the buffet for breakfast and saw the other nice couple with whom we had breakfast. The nice couple wants to vote C C & M off the dinner island if you know what I mean. I told them we should wait until after dinner tonight and see if Mumbles speaks as he may want to vote Chatty Cathy off too. Shoot, he might be a nice guy--a deaf guy but a nice guy regardless. Stay tuned to this station for more updates.
No democrat jokes tonight which means double jokes tomorrow.
See Yall tomorrow.
Al
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